A consequence of different cultures. 10 points for the best advice. Thank you?

I am Asian. I am born and raise in Asian. I came to America when I was 16 years old. However, I am still a very traditional Asian woman.





Anyway..





When in come to dating. In my cultures, we expect men to make a first move. Women should be not show an desperate attitude. We should allow men to chase us a little bit--to show his love and sincerity.





I do that, but most of my American friends think I am playing games, teasing and very cold to a man who love me...





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P.S.





I have never watched Asian movies that the best actresses are willing to make love with the best actors before marriage. It is very rare for the media to show those types of behavior.A consequence of different cultures. 10 points for the best advice. Thank you?
You might need to change you way of thinking a bit.





When in America, do as the Americans do. Men in this country and other western countries don't understand or care what rules of courtship are expected of them from a different cultural point of view.





When they are trying to establish a friendship/relationship they probably don't understand what you are expecting from them, they are not Asian they are American.





You might come across as your friends have said, so lighten up and relax, you need to realize things are done differently in America!





Don't base real life on movies, you get confused and loss touch with reality. Be yourself, be friendly and approachable, and you don't have to have sex just because they talk to you.A consequence of different cultures. 10 points for the best advice. Thank you?
Why do you allow anything to influence your behaviour? Just be true to yourself.
Guys do like to make the first move, and they also like a challenge. But don't expect them to break their back, you have to make an effort also. At some point it should be a two-way street. So don't keep them at arm's length forever. Many people believe that having sex is fine if you are in a committed relationship.
Not just Asian women love the chase, American women do too, so you fit right it. As for the guys, they always like someone that they have to work hard for.
What you portray is meant to be attractive and alluring and it is far better than acting like a tart!


Women who don't chase men like their life depends on it get more respect in the end.
just be yourself. dont let other people try to change what you believe is right for you.
In America, a long time ago, woman used to wait for the man to chase. Now a day woman are more independent and more self confident and so that is why woman in America are chasing more today. So when they see you acting like that they think you are teasing.
Just do what you do sweetie, the man who loves you will love you for that, just the way you are. That is what is wrong with alot of American girls, they throw themselves at men without even knowing them.
The chase is half the fun and any man should not be in love with you that soon. Love takes a while to build and blossom.


It used to be the same way in our culture as well but with every generation sex is more free and the sanctity of marriage goes out the window. Hold on to your values and you will find the right man that will honor them and respect you for them.
It is always difficult when people of different cultural backgrounds get together in a relationship (even in a friendship). This is made obvious by the fact that reasonable, even kind people, tend to hate people just because of the color of skin. This doesn't have much to do with actual color of skin, it has to do with being afraid of values, traditions, and lifestyles that are not your own.


While I agree that we all need to be tolerant of other cultures and lifestyles, I do not agree that we need to accept these values as our own. If I don't agree with something that you do, I will do it differently in my own life, but I will NOT treat you unkindly just because I don't agree with you.


In any relationship, you need to be willing to listen to the other persons beliefs and value system. This might be difficult, but unless you understand where their values come from you have no right to say anything about them at all. When you have the information about their beliefs and customs, you can decide if this is something you admire or do not admire, but either way, you should never judge someone based solely on their culture or traditions. In a romantic relationship this can be especially hard because you have to somehow meld your beliefs and traditions to make a coherent and reasonable value system for your children and yourselves. My suggestion for someone trying to meld cultures is to make sure you talk about the things that are important to you and decide together if you like the other persons philosophy and choices in this area.


Don't let traditions keep you from loving someone or doing something that you know is right, but don't allow anyone to tell you that your cultural heritage is not important and should not be valued.
Do whatever you want to do that will make you feel good about yourself if you want someone to love you for what you are or for what people think you should be
Be true to yourself and do not let Western culture change you.
Stop 'teasing' the men, as this will come across as you being a 'bit-ch'!


Stuff your culture, you are now in a different country and you should be conforming to the ways that are acceptable to this country.


You don't have to 'shag' every guy you date but you also have to be honest with them, if you don't think its going to work out, TELL THEM, in most countries honesty comes before anything!
I have noticed this when dating asian women. American men are used to American women who tell you what they want. This actually happened to me. My last gf would never come to me after a fight. She would always wait for me to come to her. I did not understand this. It is a difference in cultures. I did not understand why i always had to chase her and she did not understand why i wanted her to chase me a little or atleast show some interest. There has to be communication between the 2.


Remember this tho. When I really want someone I do not let her get away.





Stay true to yourself that is most important dont compramise who you are for anyone.





P.S.


Don't listen to Jenny. or Badass, Some people are bitter and want to make others feel that way also.
the two cultures both have their differences and if your American friends cant understand that then are they really your friends so long as it is only Asian men you treat like this. If you mean American friends don't like this sort of treatment then you must respect that is there culture too.
first off realize that your not going to figure out how to be in a relationship from a movie ....





secondly having a guy chase you is teasing/playing games .... but so what, if thats what you want to do then do it





Wait until you find someone who is willing to play your games, and until then just have fun
Your American friends are not very good friends. Do what is right for you. If it was in your cultures tradition to sleep with everyone you see and you didn't want to then I hope you wouldn't. If this is something in your cultures tradition that fels right to you. Then stick with it! your friends should support you no matter what. That's what friends do!